Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Who are you and what are you doing here!?!

Most of you who will read this are my beloved regulars and some newbies. But the rest of you are a bunch of bizarre creatures that managed to transport your way here via a search engine...and I'm not impressed with your avenues of discovery. I'm guessing a lot of 'you people' are actually a bunch of teenage boys because I was on to you when your search of both elbows touch belly button had me feeling right back in high school when I would be asked to try and touch my elbows behind my back. You may have given my husband a show, but I won't be fooled so easily again (oh but Branden says, "Thank you".)

I'm almost beginning to think that my site is becoming a question and answers section for idiots. This is obvious by the ridiculous search of do owls have whiskers. Of course they don't and if you had spent any time at my blog, you would have had the answer in a previous post! I suppose you are a bit more innocent in your quest than the searchers looking for baby owls in a bucket because that sounds a bit cruel to me. Why would you keep baby anythings (except fish or toads) in a bucket!?! Chrissy found that it wasn't all that odd by pointing out this blog to me. Ok, well I still think it's stupid but not as stupid as who needs brain cells anyway spongebob. I may take back my previous comment on 'you people' being teenage boys...maybe I should stick with 9 year old school kids.

I know that my in-laws read my blog so which one of you thought it would be funny to send people looking for the Sasquatch militia?? You know how freaked out Branden gets when you start telling Big Foot stories and how you want to go on a search to find one! I'm the one that has to comfort him at night and tell him "It's ok, we only have to worry about leprechauns here. Go to sleep!" 


I am wondering if I should take extreme offense to those of you who found me from people that look like llamas!! I may have not had braces but I definitely don't have anything close to llama teeth! I also don't appreciate freak show faces and stupid face passport. You people are just mean...and disgusting: boobies and cheese, what are you? Some sort of male complex connoisseur, because if you are, you forgot the red meat and beer! I might give a thank you to whoever found me from stick figures in love because Branden and I are far from that thin but hey, I'll take what I can!

These last searchers, I will use in a sentence:
Attention over here to the flashing button where you can see crying baby Jesus because he has handcuffed ankles.

"You people" are weird. But I also like weird so thanks for the blog fodder! (except YOU boobies and cheese, you are just gross!)

27 comments:

  1. What do you mean 'you people'?" Also...are you the pot or the kettle? :oP

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  2. C'mon, Maggie--ease up. Not everyone who reads your blog can be as smart as, say, ME!

    Did you know that I once took an IQ test & I passed! (I think that means I have one.)

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  3. Just wandered over to your site from another site. Cork! We lived in Co. Cork in 1984-88. Things were quite different then! I look forward to hearing more about you, and will check out your older posts!

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  4. Joshua, considering that I put herbs in my cookies, I think I must be the pot ;)

    Paige, I just hope they weren't looking for a recipe...

    Fishducky, crap, I've never taken an IQ test so I guess that means I don't have one! I should ease up then ;)

    Susan, welcome to my Cell! I can imagine the Rebel County being a lot different in the 80's! I absolutely love it here and we are really hoping we can stay permanently.

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  5. I KNEW IT!! It's that Washington upbringing.

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  6. Ok, I only ever wanted to go to Evergreen because they didn't have grades! (but on a side note, herb cookies really mean you can't eat just one!) lol
    I'm going to get a skype call from my mom who reads my blog! Don't worry Ma, I have never had pot...or kettle for that matter ;)

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  7. I wish I was still a teenager (sigh).

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  8. I just touched both of my elbows to my belly button to figure out what you were talking about.

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  9. "People who look like Llamas" That's awesome! I want to search that on google images LMAO!

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  10. How about giggle fest? No because I am giggling!

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  11. Tony, I wouldn't go back and touch my teenage years with a 10ft pole! Ok, I guess not all was bad but ugh, I'm so glad they are over.

    Mandy, hehehehe. I figured out the purpose when I tried it and thought, "How pointless is this!? They won't touch because my boobs are in the...wait a minute!!!".

    Elisa, I really feel bad for anyone who looks like a llama...they aren't God's prettiest creatures ;)

    Melynda, I'm glad to see you here again and to give you a giggle (...that sounds slightly odd...give you a giggle...)

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  12. I love the search terms that bring people to blogs. And you know, it's not so bad that someone SEARCHED on "boobies and cheese", but that they FOUND YOU searching on "boobies and cheese".

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    1. Yeah, thanks for pointing that out! I still can't figure out how I came up for that search!

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  13. Boobies and cheese? My Lord! That's one combination I'd have never thought of. And rest assured, Padded Cell Princes... you don't look like a llama, but you knew that already. I'm going now. I need to check if my owl has whiskers.

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    1. Thank you for saying I don't look like a llama. That means a lot to me ;)

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  14. P.S. Don't you just love threaded comments with a reply button that doesn't work?

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    1. I do hate it but I found that it will work if I get online with Firefox...handy since I use Safari on my Mac and Chrome on my PC! irg

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  15. Replies
    1. yeah, yeah, yeah, go enjoy your boobies and cheese!

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  16. I don't understand, and I'm serious. What does boobies and cheese mean? It's going to drive me crazy.

    Love,
    Janie

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    1. Your guess is as good as mine! Maybe girls like cheese balls and boys like cheese boobs??

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  17. OMG this was hilarious! I did not find you via any search engine wording involving elbows, cheese, boobs or girls who love rubber sheets.

    I found you thankfully via another post via another blogger and so on. I could spend hours tracking down wonderful reads and I'm pleased I found yours!

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    1. Thanks for stopping in and visiting my Cell! I'm please to know that you found me a more traditional way and I won't write you off immediately for coming up with "girls who love rubber sheets"! lol ewwww! I'm glad to have given you a good laugh :)

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  18. Oh don't worry the rubber sheets were a natural progression from boobies and cheese which I don't EVEN want to try and figure out.

    Mandy_Fish: I laughed when I read that you had to do the elbow thing to figure it out. LOL.

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    1. I'm laughing and cringing at the same time over the rubber sheet progression!

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  19. The rubber sheets would last much longer than conventional ones I would think. Yes please laugh over the thought - I trust nobody will ever make such absurd things but who knows? Maybe in Kinksville U.S.A. they are already sold somewhere.

    And I STILL am trying to figure out boobs and cheese. Makes my rubber sheet comment seem mild.

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Does this straitjacket make my butt look big?