Anyhoo, onto my favorite search engine hits!
This first one, I do have to admit that I practically asked for it. The first time I posted my Skinny Dipping Story I received endless search engine hits about it, so no surprise that I find a horde of these in my current stats:
skinny dip, skinny dip stories, skinny dippin stories, naked skinny dipping, skinny dipping photos
To all of you looking up skinny dipping stories, I will withhold judgement since I have a blog post with this as the title. I even find the "skinny dippin" searcher a bit of a good laugh because I can just hear your deep south accent saying it! But to all of you skinny dipping photo searchers, shame shame!! It's perverts like you that could have turned my innocent story into a porn site! (and now I can't become famous because of you since there is a chance that those photos could surface one day!)
Onto some people who are nice and should teach those creepers what is acceptable to look up on search engines...but still don't have much to do with me.
There is nothing wrong with looking up pretty hummingbirds. I just find it ironic that the original post that drew this attention was a rant about people's stupidity over confusing a kingfisher with a hummingbird! I really hope the people read the clarification that the photo was NOT a hummingbird or else the vicious cycle of stupidity will continue.
brown paisley design
This doesn't seem too odd. It came from my Random post from not that long ago, but my mind keeps thinking that brown paisley designs in a padded cell are most likely done with excrement, so I don't know if this searcher was a fabric lover or poo perv.
These next four searches just make no sense. Who searches these things anyway and why in the world did they find me in the process??
have to put bars
the bench and attempted
i have mentioned
the newer version of
Maybe the 'bars' came up from my title of "Padded Cell", but I'm pretty sure I haven't mentioned bars because I don't literally live in a padded cell! The second one makes no sense whatsoever. What were you trying to find?? Maybe someone attempting to bench press but dropping it on their head?? You have a pretty dyslexic way of putting things. The other two are just plain boring! Do you even realize the things you could be searching online!?! My world has been transformed from searches of "kitty cute enough to make your head explode", "pranks using saran wrap", and "baby laughing over pony pulling a cart, driven by a lemur with a puppy being groomed by the fluffiest kitten wearing a ladybug costume"! (Ok, so I may have made that last one up but how cute would THAT be!?!).
ridiculous christmas sweaters
I blog 1 photo in a recent post and I'm already getting a search hit from it...sweet! Christmas is still 2 months away, so maybe I'll open up to a whole new group of readers! Bring it on bad Christmas sweater people!
Um, what!?! I really hope this person disinfected themselves before they left my site.
thats just gross
I couldn't agree with this more! And the best part was that this one is listed right below my "korean boobies" search hit. Even my blog stats are prudish!
Branden loves checking my stats and especially my search engine stats. Just two days ago when I posted about the creeper who wanted to photograph me naked in a rural area, Branden smiled after reading it and said, "I wonder what search engine hits you're going to get from this!".
Crap! Sometimes I just ask for it!